Certain topics are hard to cover, like a bad story they don’t carry laughter or good Any Things. This kind I always avoid and run away from with any little excuse I get my hands on. Take for instance the speed at which my laughter fades away amid a conversation whenever parents are mentioned. I hate snobs, they really irritate me, but if you are the kind of a person who will always talk of mums and dads, trust me am the worst snob you will ever meet. This however does not mean I never get caught in a situation. This Sunday will be Father’s day and there is no rat hole that will hide me from the festivities and mentions. At the church, they gave flowers to sons and daughters to give to their mother’s the other time and I am sure the same will go on this Father’s Sunday.
While conversing with my peers, out of nowhere someone usually mentions a parent, parental care or anything to do with parenting, and my happy mood uncontrollably falls to roots. It could be a football conversation, academics or even just a random talk; still someone will always find a way to press in the old folks play button. Having had a good experience with this I always try to drive the topic away out of my disliking; bring in a different story or excuse myself from the group whenever the latter doesn’t work. But when I am caged and no escape route or excuse seems available I recreate them. Yes recreate and talk of them as I would wish them alive.
In most instances I craft a rich dad with a reputable profession. I give him a high salary scale and a ward him big positions in large organization. In such illustration I talk of my dad as a young father; veryunderstanding and loving, I make him my palsy-palsy, a best friend. Also, once in a while I also present him as mean guy, the kind nobody wants to be close with. I present a brutal sperm donor who never followed to know what his cell became twenty six years later. Call me a cruel son, but this is me. I think of people and define them depending on the last memory I have. And in this case what is more vivid is that he deserted us, left us and has never returned from the dead. So all the pampering, the love and affection he used to show us do not count.
I am bad with disappointments, I never demand promises, he is the one who voluntarily promised to be there for us in all times, bad and good and I expect him to keep to that. To be present this Sunday and to be ready to receive my Father’s Day Gift like other dads will. This sounds jealous, I know, but who is not jealous? Tell me one, and I will narrate to you the kind of hard conversations I do have with myself after running from the mum-dad conversations. The volume of tears I shade and the pain of that chocking gulp I take to avoid wailing like a baby in public. Tell me I am not human because I’ve got feelings, very strong feelings for a man and a woman now all gone to the bones.
Nothing in this solar system can replace a father; the man who held me in his lap and put a warm shawl over my soft skin, the man who held my hand as I struggled to make my first baby-step, the father who held for me the bike tight as I made my first half cycles. Noting can replace the man who was my first driving instructor, first academic tutor, counselor and provider for anything and everything. I knew him first, and then he introduced me to God-The-Father, the only support I have left today. Believe me I would exchange everything in this world for the two old folks way beyond the horizon. Buy them the best gifts my money can afford and seat with them and talk, drain all their love and tender care. Today I would make them proud of me as their son by giving them all the love and respect they need.
This is why I plead with you to get a gift, a card or just time to be with him. Just like you never forget Valentine’s Day, Christmas or even your lover’s birthday, make this day a special day for him. Share in its joys, laugh about it with him, dance, roast a goat’s head or just buy him that tie, belt or wallet he has always wanted. He is all you’ve got and he has got no replacement. Happy Father’s Day to you all, enjoy.